Thursday, 24 January 2013

Without you today's emotions would be the scruff of yesterday's









Today's walk to the Job Centre at a crisp 08.35 sure was a lot more pleasant than I'd anticipated. I bumped into my grandmother on the way back home, as she was walking down to hers, it was nice to have a stop-and-chat for once. My mother then passed in the car on the way to collect a parcel in Pontardawe and purchase some more balls for the dog. I tagged along for the ride and saw this, thought S would appreciate my audible guffaw;

Bubbly Bastard!
I also happened upon an empty and beautifully eerie double decker, alone in a car pack, and an Ystradgynlais decked in red white and blue bunting... I hope the French haven't taken over yet (I'm planning on doing an Open University degree in French and Spanish if I can swing the funds, but it'll be 3 years at the least before I can jab my way out of a tricky situ)!



Then we went for a drive up Brecon way, to see the white. It was so beautiful on the way up I couldn't quite think of anything else in my mind, like, 'this is so much, I don't know why we don't all bask and worship in it'. Drive by...








So, that was the loveliness of the outside variety. In an attempt to feel more positive I've decided (out of real necessity!) to make space in my room, care about it again, so that it hopefully cares for me when I need space, hoping it'll cradle me in inspiration. All the key components are there...










Finally getting around to (carefully!) stacking all my books away, making space on my 'desk', and resurrecting some photo-lovelies from from my box of 'past wall pieces' actually made a difference, and shiny lights and colours always makes a kid throw out a couple smiles eh. I'm also getting better at getting 'round to sticking 'stuff' down in some of my (many) 'sketchbooks'. Though this usually occurs when I'm supposed to be doing serious stuff like filling in forms and whatnot, it nevertheless makes me feel productive and not so shit.







Though this aforementioned task typically involves a lot of looking through old 'bits', (pictures, stickers, tickets, memory documents basically, little paper triggers) recently I haven't been so maudlin in this task. Where before I would be wistful for bygone days, rosily yet melancholically nostalgic for that which (never really quite) was, nowadays I'm just plain old glad that I lived those little pages. I'm particularly fond of the 'Easy Rider' bus ticket from Hay Festival. All bus tickets should be christened thusly...

So, at this point in the evening, I'm feeling ok. Puzzled about the ever-encroaching future for sure, but a little more in tune with the past.

Finally, does anyone think I could do this;


I'm not worrying about Physiology here, I can work with that, but minimum fundraising is £3,300, by October...

Nos da.